How Disgusting!

Had this couple come in last night as part of a table of 7. Aside from holding up the table for a good hour before anyone else joined them he was quite rude.

He blew his nose in the clean nice white napkin at the table! In a honkin' fashion to boot!

How disgusting! It really grossed me out.

What are some of the most disgusting things you have seen people do at the table?

You've Got Some Nerve!

So these two guys walk in and take their table of two.

They ask me for two big 9oz glasses of wine so I go get it. I come back with them and they say would it be possible to get a bottle. Well yes Mr. Arshole sure you can.

I get them a bottle. Then one of them orders a salad and the other a hot appetizer. That will be all for now they add.

Meanwhile they order a second bottle and finally finish their appetizers. Then the guy who orders a salad is having his friend speak for him. Do you have any vegetarian dishes? No Mr.Arshole we are a freakin's steakhouse I politely say.

His vegan friend orders a side and he orders a sirloin and shrimp. Meanwhile they order another bottle of wine. This is their third now. The same people who were just going to have a glass at the beginning.

Then while having them taste the third bottle they say , we should get free appetizers for this.

I don't say anything. What a nerve these people have! Why do you think you are entitled to free appetizers for drinking some wine you cheap F###***s. Then they kept ordering free bread.

Then I give them the bill and then his vegan friend says can we maybe get a glass only each of more wine? WTF! Then they want more bread but sorry the kitchen is closed and we are out.

Final bill $186 - Tip $10.00

Cheapskates! Go eat somewhere else next time!

Preferably where you came from.

The First Quiz Of The Year

I am returning the quiz.. Believe it or not it didn't attract many visits so depending on how this one turns out I may do it again periodically.

1. Vouvray is a white wine from the Loire Valley near the city of Tours in France. The primary grape is Chenin Blanc but what is the secondary grape you may find in Vouvray that few people know of?

2. Using proper etiquette how should a guest sip their soup using the spoon?

3. Syllabub is a dessert made of whipped cream , white wine to which sherry or brandy may be added , lemon and sugar. Who was the Queen of England at the time this dessert was introduced?

4. What is the principal grape variety in the wine Cheval Blanc?

5. Bistrouille or bistouille is a term used in Northern France for a mixture of brandy and what else?

6. What is a Palindrome? Not cooking or wine related. 2 bonus points.

Don't Talk During This Moment

When the guest is settling the bill it is important not to talk. If you talk while the person is signing the credit card slip or putting their pin number in the debit machine you could actually blow the tip amount the guest might have left. You may say something that could lead them to think you are sucking up to them. Don't all of a sudden start talking about the weather or something stupid that will detract them from giving you the big tip. You have done the job and now it is time to just shut up.

The pressure is all on them to give you as much as you will get out of them. Don't be nervous about not talking at this moment. There is no need to be overly friendly. This is the time you have been waiting for so enjoy the moment and watch them fret on how much they leave.

Just like a good salesperson who ask for the sale to the prospect by handing them the pen your job is to be quiet until they okay it.

I know there is always a slight inclination during this moment while waiting to say something but by being silent you are telling them buddy this better be a good tip.

When handing them a debit machine just smile and say thank you once again and wait for the transaction to finish before saying anything. Don't even talk to the other guests. They may overhear something and change the amount or just plain carelessly miss a digit in the tip they leave you. Look away and think of something else.

I know that we have all talked during this moment. At least I have and when I do I almost cringe at myself when the guy looks up from the debit machine cause I have wrecked their train of thought.

This is the one time when shutting up is the right thing to do.

Stay Home Tonight

About an hour before heading to work tonight the GM calls. It has been snowing all afternoon and the roads were treacherous. I was scheduled to close tonight and it being a Monday night in February didn't hold much promise it was going to be busy.

She says with the commute would I rather just stay home and be safe and not to worry about coming in tonight. I thought about it for about 4 seconds and since I was going right back at it tomorrow night thanked her for thinking of me. So I stayed home and cooked some dinner and had some family time.

I thought that was pretty nice.

Make'em Laugh

Last night I was delivering some bacon wrapped scallops to a table. As I approached the couple I put it in the centre of the table when the ensuing conversation took place.

Her: Oh no that is for my husband. I don't like seafood.
Me: I don't like seafood either.
Her: Oh really.
Me: Yes everytime I see food I eat it!

She and the hubby laugh. Okay , okay maybe it was a bit corny but they liked it.

A Twist Of Fate - 1993

In 1992 after my first contract on the ships I came back to Canada to take the Cordon Bleu Pastry Course in Ottawa. The course was starting in September and I had managed to procure some affordable accomodation at the YMCA during the three months the course would last. I was working between the Chateau Laurier and the Ottawa Congress Centre to keep some money rolling in. So it was a busy time yet fun learning how to make pastries , cakes , breads etc.

I had it all figured out so to speak. I was going to take the Basic Course in Ottawa and January take the advanced course in London England. I even had the YMCA booked near the school in London and put down a deposit. I figured I could find a job easily in London and using the great public transportation system they had would have my choice as well where to work.

Finishing up the Basic course and passing quite nicely it was time to head to London. I was real excited. But there was something that came up that would totally put my plans on a different course.

My Mother worked at this lodge during the summer and someone who was high in position there was moving to England to this place called Ware in the county of Hertfordshire about an hour plus north of London. She had gotten a job with this golf course and her friend mentioned that why don't I apply where she works and she could get me in and I would be able to work in the kitchen and get some experience while taking the course and of course get paid for it as well. Also I would be able to help out in the dining room. I thought that might not be a bad idea.

So I spent the rest of the Christmas and New Year in London taking in the sights and going to a New Year's Day concert.

Arrangements were made and I was heading up to Ware a few days before school started. I was asked at the time to save some money and leave the YMCA early to head on up there. An interview had been set up and so I thought this was a done deal. I was staying at their place which I understood was okay with them until my staff accommodations were ready at this job.

The day of the interview my Mom's friend introduces me to the GM and we sit down. She leaves and it is just us two. I am anticipating something like start on Monday but oh no!!

He says we will not be doing any hiring till May. I am sitting there flabbergasted. WTF!!!
I fly out of the meeting hunting for this stupid bitch who said to me this was a no brainer. She says I am sorry. Christ is that it. I move from my confines at the Y as per your instruction only to come up here and there is no job. I phoned my Mother and asked her what kind of friend she thought she worked with at the lodge. I was livid as my money was not of the money tree variety.

Now I was more stuck up there than anything. The Y opportunity was gone and I spent time working on call with agencies doing menial banquet waiter work for a pittance. I finally had to take this job in a parts plant where I spent my time bending iron parts into shape. But the income I was making was not enough to cover the cost of going to school , lodging and eating.

As well , after a couple of weeks this nice person gave me the heave ho out of their place so I had to get a half board place where I paid for two meals a day. Breakfast and dinner. Ever take advances on your credit card at 2 1/2 to 1. Yes one pound was equal to $2.50. Made for some real good interest charges.

At the end I managed to pass the course but I was so broke I had to head back into waitering. I got a job as a head waiter at the Island Hotel on the Isles of Scilly. For those of you who have no idea where Tresco is located have a look. www.tresco.co.uk

It was a good place to save money and pay off the credit card cause there was nothing to do but drink and eat. It was an island and the only way you could get there was by helicopter or a seasick 3 hour ride on a supply ship. People's faces were usually colored green on arrival with open gaping mouths over the sides of the ship.

My saving grace out of it all was the ship I used to work on use to visit the island. On a visit I saw my former co-workers and they were surprised to see me working at such a remote place. They asked me why don't I head back to the ships. I think it was the next day I phoned Fort Lauderdale and they put me on a ship for November out of Antigua.

I worked on Tresco for about 5 months before that credit card was paid off and I had saved a bit of money to holiday before flying back to Canada.

Looking back I can laugh at it now and say I saw the island of Tresco and St. Marys but it was kind of bad how that all turned out. Just on a recommendation on a job that never was there 3,000 miles away. I had budgeted everything out to get me through but I should have stayed at the YMCA in London that I originally planned.

I know everything happens for a reason and it was an ironic twist of fate that landed me back on the ships again. All because of a promised job that never existed in the first place.

Everything happens for a reason. We just never know it at the time.

A Book

For some time now I have wanted to start a book about my adventures during 30 years since I took the bartending course back in 1979. But with such a busy household I never really get started.

But alas , I have found a way in which I think it will work. You see when I was studying for my Sommelier exams I used a tape player to record my notes on so I could play them back while I was driving to work in the car. This way I could listen when it was quiet and focus on what I needed to learn.

So the other day I bought a new audio tape recorder to do the same thing. This way while I am driving to work , which takes about 35 minutes , I will talk about what I am going to write about. That evening or following morning , I will spend time in front of the computer rather than just stare at it and write down what I was talking about the night before.

Honestly I don't have any idea how else I will accomplish such a daunting task. So beginning when I drive to work tomorrow night it will be with the expressed purpose of writing a book.

I will see how it goes and keep you posted one month from tomorrow which will be August 24th.

A Unique Set-Up

One time I worked at this restaurant in England for a few days when I was with an agency and the tables in the dining room had nothing but the chairs , tablecloth , and salt and pepper on it.

Then when the people arrived and we took the order we put all the cutlery down they needed and got their drinks. That was it. When you think of it , although it looked kinda silly seeing a table empty without utensils , there was absolutely not one on the table afterwards that did not have a purpose.

Then when the meal was over the table was empty again and crumbed down to get ready for the dessert order and then we would repeat the same process.

Pretty cool even though it did slow down the service , then again no one was in a hurry to eat either.

What different table settings has anyone out there come across in their travels or jobs?